The Return of Miss Wade and a video tribute to Don Redman, Jacksonville City Council.

Miss Wade would like to announce to her adoring public---which has spent almost a half minute too long in blogeristic suspended animation-- that she is back in the blogarena.

She is back, and she has a bone to pick.  A big and bossy bone.  And unfortunately a fat starved, bossy bone.  A few months ago, Miss Wade decided to check herself into a fat farm.  Now lest the more waggle tongued among you shake something loose near your tonsils, let her stop you before you engage the source of many of your toothsome incomes into something as unprofitable as false gossip about the First Lady of Jacksonville.

She did not check into a fat farm for the usual reasons.  No, it was in the pursuit of journalism and justice.  Contrary to rumor, Miss Wade does not struggle with negative feelings about her luscious though primly toned figure.  After all, it is not she who has been asked to leave the Golden Corral on Southside in a debilitating and embarrassing manner on three separate occasions (yes, you left your wallet, "anita" and you were identified to the Authorities.) for stuffing her Walmart manufactured 'purse' with unpaid for cuts of prime d beef. 

Golden Corral overindulgence after an unsuccessful attempt to displace Miss Wade from her perch at Hamburger Mary's aside, Miss Wade checked into what she assumed was a reputable fat farm only to find out that she had been abducted and sold into slavery, bound for the Middle East.

Apparently there are some very wealthy men with oil wells who will spend obscene amounts of money for the possibility of, well, shall we say 'comingling' with beautiful women from America.  And Miss Wade was a victim of just such a loathly enterprise.  Flattering though the attempt might have been from a certain point of view, it is certainly beneath the dignity befitting the First Lady of Jacksonville to consider working without a contract for strange men.

Consequently she found herself imprisoned in the Haj Dubai, without a friend in the world except for the massage boy, a hair stylist, two personal assistants, a nutritionist, and a really very interesting kind of pedicure expert (more on that later).  

And room service.  When they felt like it.  And they were always very snippy and refused to speak anything other than foreign gibberish.

With nothing more than a can of low fat tuna (in spring water) a pair of strappy high heel shoes and a 'Sherizade" costume, Miss Wade was forced to escape the country of Dubai and flee across the desert in order to rejoin her Christian tribe here in Jesusville.

The Documentary of her Escape from Dubai was recently aired on the CW's "In The Pits" television show, using actual footage from the whole ghastly affair.

Anyways, she is working very conscientiously to restore her former level of professional labor in the publication of Big Boned and Bossy, and hopes to have all the office boys with their hands full within short order.

Until then, she certainly hopes that you enjoy her favorite new music video, which she has dedicated to Jacksonville City Council Jerk, Don Redman.

With love and affection, 

Miss Karrissa Wade

the First Lady of Jacksonville